Boot camp

It's taken me 3 weeks, but I finally love boot camp. It took me a while to get used to the trainer and the workouts. I'm shocked that I actually ended up staying later today chatting with someone and then we were able to ask the trainer some questions we had. I don't know if I've lost any weight because my ass is avoiding the scale like the plague. I do know that I feel awesome! In fact, I feel so good that I considered pushing our ivf back a month or two. I doubt I will because I'm anxious to get started, but just the fact that it crossed my mind is a big deal. I'm enjoying my workouts enough that I'm not looking forward to giving them up anytime soon.

Heart Rate Monitor

Since I'm doing more running and interval training, I invested in a new Polar ft4. It is awesome! This morning's run was 3 miles, 30 minutes, 300 calories burned. I'm irritated that the scale is up 3 lbs because of pms, massive weight training, and running again. Oh well. My body can do things today that it couldn't do 3 weeks ago so I'm pretty damn proud.

9 days until our crazy vacation begins!!

2 Weeks

As of yesterday it has been 2 weeks with absolutely no gluten/flour and very little sugar. The exception for the sugar has been dark chocolate chips because a girl needs some sanity. I only have 4-5 and never after about 2pm. It's a really rare treat, but it's enough to keep me on track. I haven't gotten on the scale much, but I know my body is changing. I've been working out to the point of complete soreness and eating well so there's really not much else I could do anyways.

In other news, I've probably got 6-7 weeks until my next cycle starts. I thought it would seem like a long time, but it's creeping up on me. We only have several theme park trips (Disney, Legoland, California Adventures, and Sea World) and only 2 more full boot camp sessions until then. No big deal. Boot camps only run 4 weeks so I timed it to end around the time I start stim injections. I can continue doing it through Lupron/BCP, but they make me give it all up for stims, retrieval, transfer, until pregnancy test. I'm doing everything I can to prepare for this next cycle so I have high hopes that it will work. Fingers crossed.

Yeah. That.

No Pain No Gain I Suppose

I hurt in ways I haven't hurt for a looonnng time. My legs are so sore I can barely walk and climbing up and down stairs is nearly impossible. I had to walk through the mall yesterday and I was pretty sure I was going to die by the time I left. This morning I'm laying with the heating pad on my legs trying to loosen up my muscles for another session in about 15 minutes. I will then promptly come home and ice this time because I learned my lesson. We also have gymnastics today and I have to get some things at the store for our basket that we are assembling at school tomorrow. I'm just hoping I survive today and I can't wait to plop down in bed doped up on Motrin tonight.

Ouch

There's something very therapeutic about being so tired and sore you can barely stand. That's where I'm at right now. I love having a personal trainer and I love being pushed beyond what I think I am capable of, but 110 burpees and 110 squats this morning within the first 10 minutes almost did me in. I don't think I have EVER done 110 burpees in my life within that short of a time period. That's just brutal to do to someone on their first day! I will keep going and getting my ass kicked though because it's not just about losing weight. It's about accomplishing things you didn't know you could and pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone. I will either be pregnant or I will run a half marathon before the end of 2013. I'm just training for both in case one of them doesn't work out. Strength training increases endurance which makes it easier to run. It will increase my time, speed, and distance without fail. I will not be running this week though. I am going to sit here and watch The Kardashians from last night until the motrin kicks in.

In training for the other aspect, I have about 4 containers of vitamins coming this week. It takes 3 months of taking them before you get results with egg quality so I'm amping up my eggs along with the rest of my body. :)

Comfort Zones and Comfort Foods

I've kind of taken a step out of my comfort zone lately and signed up for a women's bootcamp 3 days a week. As far as fitness, this is a hardcore training camp so that's not out of my comfort zone. What is difficult for me is the being in a room with several other women and developing friendships with these women. I'll be the first to admit that I don't actually care much for the way women treat each other. I've seen it time and time again and I just don't like being part of it. It's everything from getting "unfriended" on Facebook from someone you have known for years to not being invited to lunch or coffee when it seems everyone else is. Men are very straightforward for the most part and don't make you deal with that bullshit. Most of my friends from the time I was little were boys and I preferred it that way. No drama and if they were mad at you they told you why. Several years ago I let my guard down and joined a mom's group because I seriously needed out of the house. I met a few amazing women that I still think of often and consider friends even though we don't talk much. I also got reminded again of why I don't do female friendships. I spent numerous hours consuming ice cream and wine while "friends" went through hard spots in their marriage. I brought Kleenex and an open mind and heart. I helped take kids to school, push strollers, change diapers, and anything else I could do. I didn't do those things because I expected something in return. I learned a long time ago that you should never do things for others because you expect to get something from them. I did those things because they were my friends and I wanted them to know they could count on me. Eventually though, when I hit a time in my life where things weren't all sunshine and roses, they bailed. When I would call to talk about things (long before anyone else even knew what was going on), they didn't answer. They just told everyone how perfect their lives were and preferred to talk about me behind my back instead of talking to me. I made some poor decisions, but those girls knew the reasons why I was making those decisions and instead of defending me and telling everyone to back off (like I did for them several times), they bailed. Like I said, I did gain some friendships from that group and I greatly appreciate that some people don't believe everything they hear. Unfortunately, it was never the same after that because I never knew what they were saying about me or who believed what. Since we have moved I have gained several "friendships" that I keep at a distance and I have 1 good friend that I can vent to about anything and share all of my ups and downs with. I saw a quote the other day that said, "I'd rather have 1 quarter than 25 pennies," and I think that is dead on. I keep a very small group of people I trust nearby and I don't easily let people in that circle. Being in a small space with several women makes me feel like I have to kind of open up to new friendships, but I will forever be cautious of who I call my friend. I refuse to let past experiences make me jaded and closed off, but you do live and learn. So I'm doing this thing and then I'm going to attempt to get knocked up one last time in a few months.

In other news, as of Monday I gave up all sugar and flour in my diet. Thank God for coffee. It has no sugar, no flour, and it has kept me from killing everyone. Yesterday and today I feel GREAT. Monday and Tuesday were not so great. It doesn't help that I'm assembling our basket for the silent auction next week and our class got the theme 'baking.' I gave up sugar and flour while being bombarded with cookbooks, muffin mixes, and sugary goodness. I should get some sort of award.