Here!

Yeah. I'm still alive. I know you were worried sick, right? I've just been buried under text books and I've spent so much time staring at a computer screen that the last thing I've wanted to do after finishing assignments is type up a blog post. You're in luck though! School work is done and the SuperBowl is on so Matt is occupied and the kids have been sent to separate rooms so as not to disturb the force. This leaves me in unfamiliar territory: having free time for a few minutes.

Really not much is happening around here. I have been doing boxing and kickboxing at least 3 days a week and it has been such an amazing force in my life. Honestly, I just cannot put into words what I am gaining from this experience. When I set a resolution that I would learn to box this year I had no idea what this would actually entail. I've had bloody knuckles, sore muscles, and have actually pushed myself to that point where I wonder if I'll ever be able to breathe again. There is one trainer that always pushes me to my very limit and I love and hate him at the same time. I've never hurt so bad and yet gained so much confidence and experience all at the same time. The other trainer I see is amazing as well, but she pushes more on strength training so I can breathe, just not move. It's a good balance and I adore the people I get to workout with. It's the first time I've ever really enjoyed working out with others. And on my "off" days? I run. I don't run terribly far or terribly fast, but I run. Boxing is a workout where I constantly have to be thinking and moving in response. Running gives me that mental downtime to think and reflect. I need both in order to have balance.

A few weeks ago I started noticing that I couldn't get through an entire meal. Then I started having bad nausea if my stomach would get too full. I wasn't stuffing myself by any means, but if I got "full" I would feel like throwing up. In this time I also stopped wanting to eat anything sweet, which is just not normal for me. Usually, even if I don't eat it, I WANT to eat it. Looking at cookies or brownies made me sick to my stomach! This cut my calories drastically because I wouldn't consume more than about 250 calories per meal and I was forcing myself to get down 4 "meals" a day. Looking back, the signs were there of what was happening. I couldn't eat citrus, sweets, tomatoes, dairy, soda,  coffee, meat, nuts, eggs, or onions without having some sort of horrible side effect. That's a LONG list of foods now that I sit here and write them all down. I knew something was up when I had to give up coffee. I posted that I brought this up to my doctor, but because of my hiatal hernia she didn't think it was a huge concern. A few days ago I started having a dull ache in my upper right side. I brushed it off as muscle soreness for a while, then thought maybe I wasn't drinking enough water or something, and this morning the pain was a bit worse and I was able to pinpoint it better. Damn gallbladder. I've had issues with it before and I'm hoping with a bland diet and rest I can get it back under control without having to go to the doctor. I love my doctor, but I also know she has my chart from my past doctor that specifically says I should have my gallbladder removed if it causes problems again. It's been about a year since I've had any issues so I suppose I was about due for this to hit again. I blame it all on Jack. I had my first really bad gallbladder attack when he was just a few weeks old. We were headed to his check-up and I was doubled over in pain against the bathroom counter sweating and feeling pretty confident that I was going to die. Good times. Not.

So there you go. I continue to workout in ways that some would consider insane, and now I can't eat. I must say it's been rather convenient in the weight loss department though. I finally got on the scale this week and was pretty darn happy. Not to mention I'm wearing some things I haven't worn in a while and the jeans I had been wearing are now VERY loose. I refuse to get out the smaller ones yet though. I'd rather feel these be way too big for a while than feel those be a little snug. I do need to change out some of my wardrobe though. Pull out some of the smaller stuff and get rid of some things that are too big now. Yay!